If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
