he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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