just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
