So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
