drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
i've created a new STD.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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