garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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