Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Randomize
