Sry I called you an 8
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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