On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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