I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
