Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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