spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
