i may or may not be watching the land before time
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
