Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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