So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
