Nicole vs. Life
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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