It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
