Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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