Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
