So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
