There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
