Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
Do vagina's smell?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
