At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
