she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
