I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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