did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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