Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
