Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
