Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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