you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Randomize
