Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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