Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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