Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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