Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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