I molested 6 butterflies tonight
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Who did Billy Mays play for?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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