your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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