Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
