Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Randomize
