i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
