If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
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