It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
