Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
so much tequila, so little girl.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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