he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
