zippers are such a cool invention
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
