my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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