he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
