Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
