So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
