I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
