I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
