Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
